The Lowest Animal.

I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the lower animals (so-called), and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man.I find the result humiliating to me. For it obliges me to renounce my allegiance to the Darwinian theory of the Ascent of Man from the Lower Animals; since it now seems plain to me that the theory ought to be vacated in favor of a new and truer one, this new and truer one to be named the Descent of Man from the Higher Animals.

Oh how right you are, Mr. Twain.

Today in English Class Ms. Silcott had us read “The Lowest Animal” by Mark Twain. Never before have I agreed with an essay more. His tasteful use of satire keeps you interested and his spectrum sized vocabulary has you gripping at the dictionary, urging you to read more, to not only finish, but comprehend. I think, perhaps, Mr. Mark Twain (or Samuel Langhorn Clemens) is one of the most intelligent, respectable men of our 19th century.

However, not to criticize Mr. Twain but his satire is flawed when he mentions a Chinese Buddhist:

… a Buddhist from China; a Brahman from Benares. Finally, a Salvation Army Colonel from Wapping. Then I stayed away two whole days.When I came back to note results, the cage of Higher Animals was all right, but in the other there was but a chaos of gory odds and ends of turbans and fezzes and plaids and bones and flesh not a specimen left alive.These Reasoning Animals had disagreed on a theological detail and carried the matter to a Higher Court.

Just a handy tidbit: a Buddhist wouldn’t argue. He’d probably just chill and meditate.

Italy. Seriously.

Do the Itailian Mayors and politicians have nothing better to do than establish completley nonsensical laws and bans? You don’t have more important things to worry about than that? Seriously?

You can blame this little article for my mini!rant below.

If I feel like building a sand castle, than I think I should have that right.

If I feel like wandering along the beaches in a bikini, than, by-god, why stop me?

If we’ve gotten to a point that you’re FINED for having “affections” in a car on a public street, than I think the world has gotten just a little too censored.

Michael Phelps : Olympic Legend. And Hottie.

I’m sure you all watched the Olympics, and if you didn’t… SHAME ON YOU.

This man, no, this LEGEND </end cliche> is quite possibly the most incredible being to walk the face of the planet. In terms of Athletes. I’m not comparing him to Mother Teresa or Ghandi, mind you, I’m just awestruck.

I’ve never been compelled to stand off my couch and scream at the television because someone was swimming. He truly is something to marvel at. And that’s not just ’cause he’s got a hot bod. His swimming times are amazing and his determination to become the next Olympic hero should inspire us all.

Michael, my hat is off to you, sir.

well hello thar

I’m currenty sitting in my living room, showerday, in a comfortable longsleeve brown and darker brown striped shirt. I am wearing a pair of Gloria Vanderbelt jeans and no shoes or socks. My Laptop is blaring the Best of Frank Sinatra, Dancing Cheek to Cheek. The Television infront of me is currently set to TLC – Channel 50, where I live. The keyboard I am pecking at is dusty, and needs to be cleaned, but, I won’t, I never do, I’m lazy.

You know, I find it difficult to describe myself unless its one of those “Describe yourself!” quizzes that only perice the surface of people, asking shallow questions that everyone can always answer. Unfortunatley, I don’t feel like following those set guidlines of “getting to know someone”. I’m not going to release my ASL, and I’m not going to tell you my breast size.

Lets talk basics here, what I like and don’t like. I like: loud music, tight jeans, comfortable chairs, good food, nice tasting coffee, doodling on envelopes, novelty pens, rainbows on everything, complicating situations, video games, reading a good book, sugar cookies, the paranormal, picking apart situations, painting my toes, flavored water, take out chinese food, rainy weather and cats. I don’t like: stereotypes, rap music, retirement homes, dog poop, vomit, small crying children, clothes that used to fit but now they don’t and you can’t seem to understand why, sleepless nights, undercooked food, homophobes, platinum blondes, when you just put on lipgloss and the wind blows your hair into the newly sticky lipgloss and your hair recieves a nice coat of sticky and it won’t go away no matter what you do, bad subtitles, not being able to find anything to watch on TV, Skiing, bitter old people, bugs, heights, dark closed in spaces. Thats me in a nutshell. I’m pretty normal, considering the above, I don’t abide by a set of rules, and I walk my own little path.

The future scares the shit out of me, and I will say it over and over again. I’m scared to drive, I’m scared to step into places I don’t know, I’m scared that I’ll trip, fall, and no one will be there to help me back up, but I’ll never show it openly. I’ll just hide it, I’ll act loud, I’ll act like I don’t care what you think (sometimes, I really don’t) and just carry on my merry way. I don’t want to end up working at McDonalds having no future and a facefull of zits. I know I won’t end up there, its just the little pessimist inside of me screaming out the MAYBE and never the WILL HAPPEN. What do I WANT to do? Honestly, I’m not even sure anymore. Something that DOESN’T deal with people.
Can’t stand ‘em.

Well, that seems like a decent summary. I’m pleased with it. Don’t expect constant postings.